A ridiculous time of the morning I know, but I have been so busy trying to organise my next career move, that the only time I get at my disposal is stupid o'clock when I am awake wondering if I am making the right study & job decisions.
There are a few other complex and challenging situations that I am managing at the moment, but they are not really my problems. Without going into detail the extra demands are external-ish, more a case of supporting and assisting those I know (and in some cases are close to) because they can't cope with what life's thrown at them at the moment. I always find it is a good distraction from ones own self indulgence to focus on, and become actively helpful to others who may have come to you in trust for advice or nurturing.
Situations like this pull your head out of your own backside and (in my experience) prevents woeful wallowing and self indulgence. I prefer to be kept busy, as I tend to get bored easily, so being occupied is a good thing. Equally, investing time and energy elsewhere with no agenda other than to feel a sense of reality and purpose can enhance your own sense of well-being. If you have been able to improve or even just recognise/empathise/validate somebody else's negative situation by either supporting them, or resolving something positively that was impacting on their life it can only be a good thing.
I am seriously hoping to stop procratinating and to start practising buddhist meditation as I do need to train myself to incorporate time to replenish and switch off as well as learn how to relax and maximise my own well-being so that I don't burn out.
Since I started my blog here 6 yrs ago a lot has changed. Not just with the site (sadly not for the better) but also with my situation. I'll save it to gradually seep out in forthcoming posts rather than blurb it all out in one babbling go like I used to.
I have been diagnosed with Attention Defecit Hyperactivity Disorder in the past 18 months, which explains an awful lot to me, and has helped me to accept my quirks and foibles, so I don't see it as a problem and embrace it as part of my personality. I do, however struggle to manage the constant state of alert.............hence being up at this time :-).
Is anyone who knew me from back in the olden days still out there??????!
I have decided to start having sex again.
Since I have not had sex since I started this blog, almost 6 yrs ago I think I have earned the right to jump in with feet first.
How things will pan out I am not sure.
I think I have got past the point of caring or believing that it's all going to work out just fine.
Maybe I am on self sabotage mode.
Not that anyone here bothers any more as since the 20six system changed all my old bloggiong pals have gone their own way.
I don't think I can do relationships, they're just bollo**s!
I'm ill.
But I still don't look my age, or even remotely rough, which is weird as I'm not even wearing make-up.
I just look pale and alluring, with a slight hint of colour on my cheeks where I'm carrying a raised temperature.
I think in my nakedness, the fact I've not got the old crone look yet is cheering me up.
I've changed alot bloggers!
Like it or lump it.
I shall shortly resume typing mega amounts of bollo**s for the masses to criticise.
Be afraid, be very afraid.
Just like Spurs should be tomorrow ;-)
It's no good! I have faffed about for ages trying to get on top of this new platform (sorry to badger you Pete for tekky supp all of the time) but I can honestly say it is the mosy un-user friendly thing I have ever come across. I miss my old bloggers and bloggettes and am sad that most of the old crew have now fled and set up elsewhere..........half my friend links don't work and I can't follow my old mates from their comments on my blog either, as their identity has been deleted!
As of today I am now a member of Facebook, so if anyone from back in the day wants to find me, please email me through the "contact" option on the pink section to the left and tell me your user name from 20six. Hopefully some of the posse will pick up on this and we can get back in touch.
What a sad way to end things with what was once a lovely facility with a real sense of community
ETA: Or follow this link to a group of ex-20sixers http://tinyurl.com/yqy7xn
Hello bloggers, it's raining outside but I am feeling particularly good today.
I think I have found myself a surrogate Dad, and if the friendship works out it's going to be great to have the benefit of caring male without wondering if there's an agenda to get in my knickers.
JD is coming home today, he's in the middle of his GCSE's and I'm going to pamper him whilst he's on half term. I've also organised for the boys and I to attend family trampolining sessions, and horseriding during half term, so as long as my dodgy back holds out it's gonna be really interesting. I think I will try and financially stretch to a theme park too, as I am a sucker for fair rides.
The Champions League pain has subsided, although I still can't talk about it to people who may be less than sympathetic (MP).
I sold my East 17 tickets............................LOL after all that fuss - and only for the face value, I've hurt my back and I am quite short, so front standing meant I wouldn't see much I reckon. I sold them on ebay and 2 of my kids who had point blank refused to go were then moaning at me saying they would have come really!!! What's all that about? I also got a refund on the TT tickets as they moved the performance to MK Bowl and I'd rather chew tinfoil than watch them there.
I'm not even going to mention BB apart from the fact that Nikki must be kept in for my own personal amusement. I have had a bet on Pete to win ("wankers"), did that within the first couple of days - I always say I will bet every year and I never do! He's the best housemate ever, and I am not at all swayed by the size of his penis I promise.
Guess what - I brought my gooner luck to Watford - myself and 3 of the children were born there, and I decided that I couldn't afford the season ticket prices for the new Emirates stadium, so I was going to get a season ticket for my son and I to go to Vicarage Rd. They were bouncing on the bottom at the time - now they're going up up to the Premiership, which sadly means I cannot go to watch them as they are in direct competition with my first team.
The same things happened with West Ham. I just want to see regular live football without having to sell a body part really.